Essie's

I want to.
Move forward.

Improve my skills.
Get better technology.
Gain more experience.
Live up to my dreams.

Sometimes, I just feel scared.

What if, I could never be better than those drawings
I saw and admired on dA?
I'm sick and tired of staring into those drawings,
it makes me envious, powerless.
I wanna move my hands and start practicing again.
But, I'm just ... so scared.

To fall back to where I started.

I need to find my own motivation.
But, some ppl around me just makes things so hard for me.
They limit my source of knowledge, and finance.
How will I ever get through this stage?
SO DEPRESSING.

I guess, I'll just have to try my best.